Buddy (caller on Loveline): I am a 25 year-old male, I have been dating my girlfriend for 4 years. She’s used birth control within the 4 years, and still to this day, I cannot ejaculate in her.
Gerard: Hmm...
Buddy: It’s more of a paranoia, obsessive-compulsive thing.
Gerard: You know… um, hmm.
Frank: Is it something she wants you to do?
Gerard: Yeah, do you not want to do it or does she not want you to do it?
Man: It’s pretty much become normal now not to do it.
Adam (interviewer): Do you wear a condom?
Buddy: No.
Adam: Why? You’re having emissions while you’re in her. Stuff comes out of you all the time while you’re having sex.
Buddy: But it’s not the same as the big surprise at the end.
Gerard: [laughs] SURPRISE!
Adam: What a horrible surprise.
Gerard: Um, here’s how I feel… If she’s uncomfortable with it, Adam - No, Buddy… I’m sorry, Buddy… If she’s uncomfortable with it, that’s ultimately - you know, it’s a really hard thing for a girl to go through, especially if she gets pregnant…
Adam: SHE'S comfortable with it, HE'S freaked out about getting her pregnant!
Gerard: OH.
Frank: I mean, nothing’s 100% so if you’re not ready to take that step and MAYBE have a kid, then you probably shouldn’t do it.
Adam: Well, now you’ve just freaked him out.
Frank: I’m just saying! I mean, think about it: people that do that and then get pregnant… I mean, do you have a stable job? And say it were to happen, could you afford to take care of it and take care of it like a man?
Buddy: Oh man. If push comes to shove, yeah I could do it…
Frank: But it’s not something you WANT to do right now… I would just say this: if you’re gonna have a kid and not be happy about it, then you really shouldn’t have that kid.

Interviewer: [To Gerard] It's YOU that has the pot laugh...
Gerard: ME? Oh, weird 'cause I don't smoke pot or drink beer or anything.
Frank: [laughs]
Gerard: Wait, maybe it's Frank... Frank used to smoke a LOT of pot.
Frank: I was the championship pot-smoker. I had dreads and they SMELLED like pot. [Turns to Gerard] Remember that - We got pulled over one time, and uh, they called me 'nappy' and searched us both for weed.
Gerard: And they asked if I was a vampire.
Interviewer: So, you smoked a ton of pot but then put it away? No more?
Frank: Nah, no more. I couldn't remember ANYTHING.
Interviewer: How many years of pot-smoking do we have on our hands?
Frank: Oh man. Well, high school and college... And then, uh, the band started, and I guess about a year into the band I stopped.

“Me and Frankie got pulled over last night. Well, it’s more like we got held up by four undercover SUV special agent police. And they asked me TWICE if I was vampire. I’m not even fucking kidding. That guy doesn’t even know how he made my year. And then they let us go, they said just drive a little slower. Then, they go “are you guys Satan worshippers?!” We said “no dude.” And don’t ever call a cop dude ‘cause they don’t like it.”

(Source: 321wecametofuck)

"I wouldn’t have been able to move to LA if I felt I was going to lose my identity as a New Jerseyian. My accent has gotten thicker since I’ve lived here! LA people might hate me for saying this, but when Lindsey and I moved, we thought “Everyone here is so polite. If a bunch of people moved out from the East Coast, they could fucking run this place.” Like, the person I’m getting coffee from - he’s definitely motherfucking me and going to say something when I’m gone. Not like in New York, where they’ll just motherfuck you to your face."

-Gerard Way (via mychemquotes)

RE: Matt Pelissier being kicked out of the band

mychemquotes:

After a fight broke out in the crowd:

Frank: Um, I just wanna say, whatever's going on over here - SQUASH IT, alright? This is a place where everybody belongs, everybody has a good time... No fights, no bullshit. It's a fucking place where we don't want elitism. We ALL belong here. So, whatever's going on over here, stop it and have a good time, alright?
Gerard: BONJOURNO!
Frank:
Crowd:
Gerard: Let's keep it clean out there, jeez...

"[Our fans are] extremely creative, intelligent, expressive and very individual, aside from liking to wear black. They come from all over the place, and in their hometown they’re probably the only kid who looks like that, but when they get to our show they’re all the same. One of the best compliments I can get from one of them is, “I met my best friend at one of your shows,” or, “I met my best friend networking on the Internet, trying to get to your show.” That’s cool, because I didn’t have that. I couldn’t find any NOFX fans in my area."

-Gerard Way (via mychemquotes)

"It’s less about the bullies, and more about the victory of giving people like us a voice. And anyway, the bully is usually the guy that stays in the same town, lives in the town, fucks in the town, drinks in the town, dies in the town. Whereas, it’s usually the kid whose wearing black in the corner that ends up doing something significant."

-Gerard Way (via mychemquotes)

Gerard: [On a date] what happens, happens. You gotta go with the vibe of the evening.
Frank: I think so too, but there's a few things you always gotta keep in mind, like... to bring condoms.

Interviewer: You're taking your poodle for a walk and meet an attractive girl with a shepherd's dog. The dogs start to sniff each other. What do you say?
Gerard: Nothing. I take my poodle and leave so it doesn't get knocked up.
Frank: Just to make that clear: I'd never get a poodle. My girlfriend and I have five dogs. A Great Dane, a greyhound, a boxer/pitbull mix and two pugs. They'd knock the stuffing out of the shepherd's dog.

Interviewer: Did you ever write a love letter or poem for your crush?
Frank: Yeah, I did. Didn't work though.
Gerard: For me neither. I keep that kinda stuff to myself now.
Frank: You know what works really well though? Those little letters that the girl can circle answers on like, 'do you want to be my girlfriend yes/no?' I only got positive answers to those.

Interviewer: Frank, how does it feel to be a new member of My Chemical Romance, after the break-up of Pencey Prep? How do you feel?
Frank: It's like you're a fan of a band and one day they ask you to be in it and you get to be a part of it. I'm like a fucking kid up on stage, it's the fucking shit!
Gerard: Having him up there I felt so complete... It made it so much easier. It felt like a fucking unit, like another person to throw out energy - it was fucking incredible, I love it.

Interviewer: Mikey, why don't you ever eat?
Gerard: When he was a kid, he was so fat.
Mikey: But I eat food though.
Ray: He eats Pizza Hut, he eats Popeyes.
Gerard: Century Buffet, I was there and this kid here ate a lot. If the kid wants to eat, he eats.
Mikey: I ate my weight in sushi today.
Gerard: Like this kid just dropped so much weight one day and now he's skinny as hell. I used to be like 250 pounds.
Frank: We were all fat kids at once. We were all fucking fat.
Gerard: It's good now.
Ray: See how Matt's staying quiet...
Matt: Shut up, I'm 250!
Ray: I'm 235.

mychemquotes:

Interviewer: You guys have any funny tour stories?
Frank: Jepha got naked and put a pineapple in front of him.
Gerard: Yes! He covered his junk with a pineapple, that was really funny.

"[Our fans] are very much like shy, quiet loners. You have to have some place you need to kind of get that out. Our shows were the place to do it. One of the things that’s a common misconception about the punk rock scene is that what’s cool about it is you could go and fit in, because it’s punk rock. But in actuality, you can’t. I don’t think enough people say this about it. It was the same as being in high school with jocks. I would go to punk clubs and get shoved by skinheads because I wasn’t like them, which was just like getting shoved by jocks wearing a Ramones shirt."

-Gerard Way (via mychemquotes)